The nerves, they never fully go away. The further along I get in this pregnancy, the more my confidence grows. And yet the nervousness still lingers. It is more subtle, a quiet trickle in the background, but it is still there. DH noticed how quiet I was on the way to our midwife appointment today. He was surprised I still get nervous. I don't try to - it just creeps up out of no where.
But this midwife appointment was the best one yet. I loved this midwife (whom I had not met before- the practice has three midwives that I rotate among).
Here is the bullet point version
-They measured my belly for the first time- I have always seen that on tv shows and such (from pubic bone to top of uterus) but this was a first for me. And I am measuring right on track, which was great to hear because just today two co-workers told me that I don't look very big.
- The midwives see me every 4 weeks right now, but after my next appointment 4 weeks from now I'll start going every 2 weeks which I am really looking forward to.
- Heard the heartbeat- which is always bliss. I still get nervous for no reason but I have to say that I've been pretty sure I feel the kid moving some every day now and that helps bring the nerves down.
-Midwife went through my recent u/s report and quad screening results and said everything was beyond perfect. She was great too- making sure to go through it in detail with a bit of fanfare and make a fuss over how good it all was which was nice.
-She also said that the u/s shows my placenta is right in the front - which has no bearing on anything other then it explains why it took SO long for me to start feeling movement. And she said where I feel the pokes and jabs will be a bit more indirect. It was like she she had been in my body feeling what I am feeling cause she explained it to a T what and how I have been feeling the movement.
- I shared my concern with how tight and sore my uterus has been. She gave great insight into what was going on and put my mind at ease. I am probably really low on iron and on calcium magnesium so she advised adding in those supplements but encouraged me to keep being active (which was just what I wanted to hear).
-She also described to a T how I have been feeling with being out of breath so easily and reminded me why that is (more blood in circulation, low iron, etc). And she was very clear that it is NOT because I am out of shape- it is other biophysical reasons. Which was nice to hear because I'll admit that my out-of-breathness has been making me feel like I am a big lug.
- And I also brought up to her a concern I had with the midwife practice. The last two appointments (at 14 wks and 18 weeks) when I showed up for my appointment I ended up seeing a different midwife then I was supposed to. Which would have been fine IF it had been one of the others in the 3 person group. But instead both times I had a substitute they bring in on occasion. I was pretty livid, to be honest. I really want to know my midwives and equally as important I want them to know me. And as nice as the substitutes were, it didn't fly for me. I hate bringing up things like this with doctors/midwives, but it mattered enough to me. As it turns out, this midwife I was talking with was the lead midwife in the group and was the perfect person to talk to. I liked her explanation about the transition they are going through and how they are proposing solving it and she did apologize that that is not their goal to use substitutes. She even said that in the future I can tell the appointment desk that I only want to see the three in the practice. And she very much opened her door to feedback anytime about anything. She reiterated that this is MY/OUR experience and it is important we express what we need, what is working, what is not. I was very impressed and pleased with the conversation.